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S. has “some” things January 15, 2012

Posted by lillylikes in Everybody has a thing.
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Sunt constienta ca timpul exista. O simt pe pielea mea o vad si in oglinda :). Sunt constienta ca zilele saptamanii trec cu repeziciune. Inteleg chiar si faptul ca daca zilele saptamanii nu isi schimba numele absolut niciodata Vinerea de azi nu este aceeasi cu Vinerea de saptamana trecuta si nu va fi la fel cu Vinerea urmatoare. La fel si cu anotimpurile sau cu lunile unui an, vin-pleaca, se tot rotesc, dar nu le simt niciodata ca ar fi la fel. Motivul e simplu: pentru ca eu ma schimb, ma transform, ma modific (sa nu zic maturizez, ca nu sunt inca matura destul) si nu mai sunt eu cea de acum 2 ore, de Vinerea trecuta, de acum 3 saptamani, de acum jumatate de an, din ziua de vara – 16 iunie 1990, etc.

Asta inseamna ca pe mine si noi restul timpul ne modifica, ne modeleaza. Dar de unde vine timpul si unde se duce?! Adica timpul asta are o casa de unde iese secunda-dupa-secunda pe gaura cheii?! Intotdeauna mie mi-a fost greu sa localizez timpul in spatiu, sa il percep ca pe ceva palpabil sau sa il pot localiza cumva-undeva, sa mi-l imaginez cumva. Pentru mine timpul e ceva ce nu exista, ceva ce nu e nimic, ceva ce nu il pot atinge, ceva ce nu il pot vedea, ceva ce sta suspendat undeva deasupra Pamantului intr-un negru absolut, nesustinut de nimeni, dar cu toate acestea stiu ca exista, stiu ca e ceva important, stiu ca are influenta asupra mea si pot vedea aceste influente, stiu ca vine, stiu ca pleaca… Dar de unde si incotro?! Habar-nu-am :).

Pe voi daca v-ar intreaba cineva “Esti liber(a) Sambata 16 Martie sa vii cu noi in concediu?” la ce va ganditi prima data?! Va ganditi: unde e Martie/unde e 16/unde e Sambata sau unde le poti gasi!? Eu m-as gandi ceva de genul: daca stiu cand sunt prima data libera, daca sunt libera in Martie, daca am zile libere in jurul datei de 16, daca sunt zilele libere deja programate cu altceva, daca am bani de concediu, daca aveam planuri cu altcineva, etc.

Ei bine, eu am intalnit pe cineva care are cateva chestii foarte interesante, hai sa numim persoana S. :), si care are un mod propriu de a se raporta/localiza in timp. Cumva pot spune ca este o harta a subconstientului si care ii este de ajutor pentru a localiza timpul (zilele saptamanii si lunile anului). Daca S. aude intrebarea  “Esti liber(a) Sambata 16 Martie sa vii cu noi in concediu?” primul lucru care ii vine instinctiv in minte este “unde este Martie plasat fata de restul lunilor anului, apoi unde e Sambata raportata la restul zilelor saptamanii”. Hartile au fost desenate de S. si ne arata exact felul cum le are in minte, cum le vede si cum le percepe.

Apoi stiind unde e Martie si unde e Sambata se gandeste unde e 16 :), bineinteles.

Pentru ca da, S. are si propria harta pentru numere, un mod cu totul si cu totul inedit de a vedea numerele. Un fel de spirala fara sfarsit care porneste de la zero si pe care in sus merg numerele pozitive, iar in jos cele negative. Numerele pozitive sunt mult mai clare decat cele negative. Dintre numerele pozitive vede, foarte clar si puternic, numerele 7 si 11 si cumva le simte mai importante decat restul. Interesant este faptul ca numerele sunt  in ordine crescatoare, numerele fac bucle in diferite locuri, dar cotiturile sunt mereu la aceleasi numere, vede undeva departe 100.000, apoi si mai departe 1.000.000, dar pe masura ce numerele cresc imaginea lor este incetosata. Dar subconstientul lui S. stie exact unde este locul fiecarui numar.

Dupa ce S. isi localizeaza in minte unde e Sambata, unde e Martie si unde e 16 se gandeste la restul problemelor legate de o posibila calatorie in acea perioada. S. face instinctiv aceasta localizare (a lui Sambata, Martie sau a Numerelor), poate chiar simultan si nu dureaza mai mult de cateva fractiuni de secunda.

Pentru mine asta e o chestie. Eu nu fac asta si nici nu m-am gandit vreodata sa o fac. Sunt curioasa daca cineva-undeva pe lumea asta mai are asa o chestie. Cred ca si S. e :).

Vorbind cu S. despre aceste chestii, vazand naturaletea cu care poate localiza aceste chestii undeva in propria minte, acuratetea si siguranta cu care le face, imaginatia extraordinara a mintii si a subconstientului, placerea ca are acest sistem propriu si inedit de a vedea lucrurile m-au facut sa ma gandesc la mine. Am realizat la final ca ma simteam si mai pierduta decat stiam ca sunt deja. Eu ma vedeam pe mine miscandu-ma bezmetic in timp si spatiu precum una dintre moleculele lui Avogadro, sau ca pe o picatura de apa dintr-un ocean, sau ca pe un fulg de zapada cazand fara noima de undeva din cer. Vorbind cu S. am inceput sa vad lumea altfel, sa imi setez prioritatile altfel, sa incep sa ma organizez mai bine, sa ma inteleg eu pe mine mai bine, sa ma plasez mai bine in timp si spatiu, sa ma redescopar si sa vad lumea prin alti ochi. Prin ochii ei!

Si pentru asta ii multumesc.

English version

I am aware that time exists. I can feel on my own skin and I see it as well in the mirror :). I am aware that the days of the week go by fast. I can understand the fact that even if the days of the week never change their names, today’s Friday is not the same with the Friday from last week and will not be the same as the next Friday. The same goes for seasons or months of the year, they come  and go, go in circle, but I never experience them in the same way. The reason is simple: because I am the one that changes, transforms, remodels (not saying matures, because I don’t feel mature enough) and I am not the same with the one I was say 2 hours ago, last Friday, 3 weeks ago, half a year ago, since June 16th 1990, etc…

This means that time changes, models myself and us in general. But where does time come from and where does it go?! I mean, does time have a home from where it comes out second by second out the key-hole:)?! I always had some difficulty localizing time in space, to perceive it like something palpable or to somehow localize it somehow-somewhere, to somehow imagine a shape for it. For me time is something that does not exist, something that is nothing, something that I cannot touch, something that lies hanging some place above Earth in an absolute black void, unsustained, but still I know it exists, I know it is something important, I know that it has an influence on me and I can see these influences, I know it comes, I know it goes. But from where it´s coming and where it´s going?! I have no idea :).

How about you, if someone came and asked for instance “Are you free on Saturday, 16th March to plan a holiday trip together?” what would be the first thing you think about?! Do you think about: where lies March/where lies 16/ where lies Saturday or where can I localize them?! I would think something like: when is my first day off from work, if I am free in March, if I have free days around the 16th, if I have them scheduled for something else, if I have money for a trip, if I have plans with someone else, etc.

Well, I met someone that has a few “things” that are very interesting, let’s call this person S. :). and who has an own way to report/localize time. I could somehow say that this is a map of the subconscious and which is helpful in localizing time (days of the week and months of the year). If S. hears the question “Are you free on Saturday, 16th March to plan a holiday trip together?”the first thing that comes to mind instinctively is “where is March placed in relation to the other months of the year, then where is Saturday next to the other days of the week”. The maps where drawn by S. and show exactly how S. has them in the mind, how S. sees and perceives them.

Then Knowing where March and Saturday are, S. thinks about where 16 is :), of course.

Because, yes, S. has an own map for numbers, a truly special way to visualize numbers. A sort of endless spiral that starts at zero and on which positive numbers ascend, while the negative ones descend. The positive numbers appear clearer than the negative ones. Among the positive numbers, the number 7 and 11 appear very clear and strong, and S. experience them somehow more importantly than the others. It is interesting that numbers are in ascending order, make loop in different places, but the turns are always at the same numbers. S. sees 100.000 some place very far, and even further 1.000.000, but as the numbers increase, their image is getting blurry. However the subconscious of S. knows exactly where is the place of each number.

After S. localizes where Saturday, March and 16 are, the rest of the problems tied to a possible trip come to mind. S. does this localization instinctively, perhaps even simultaneously with the other issues, and it does not last more than a few fractions of a second.

For me this is a thing. I don’t do something similar and never thought of doing. I am curious if someone-somewhere in the world has a thing like this. I guess S. is as well :).

Talking to S. about these things, observing the natural way in localizing these things in the mind, the accuracy and assurance with which S. does them, the extraordinary imagery of the mind and subconscious, the pleasure in having an own special system to see things, made me think about myself. I realized that in the end I felt more lost than I knew I was. I saw myself moving chaotically in time and space like one of Avogadro’s molecule, or like a drop of water in an ocean, or like a snowflake falling aimlessly from some place in the sky. Talking to S. made me start seeing the world in a different way, to set priorities differently, to start organizing better, to understand myself better, to place myself better in time and space, to rediscover myself and see the world through different eyes. Through hers!

And for that I say thank you.

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Comments»

1. alina - January 15, 2012

Prin anii ’70, plaja din Matala (Creta) s-a umplut de hippioti …pe o stanca spalata de valurile Mediteranei, o inscriptie, in enegleza , a unui concept buddhist: “Today is happiness.Tomorrow never comes”

lillylikes - January 15, 2012

Foarte adevarat!

alina - January 16, 2012

E un loc atat de frumos,unde spatiul-timpul se esentializeaza in clipa, ca a fost prima oara ca am inteles un concept care poate parea abstract (dar nu e) – prezentul e tot ce avem.Nimeni nu ne invata asta.


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